On 10th April 2016 we took a pregnancy test first thing in the morning (as instructed by the clinic) and it came out positive! I was trying so hard not to get too excited but I couldn’t help it, I sat on the edge of the bed trying to calm myself down. This was it, this was the start of it and I would sit down for the whole nine months if that’s what it took. I phoned the clinic that day and booked a scan. We had to wait 18 days till we went in and in those 18 days I didn’t do any stretching or lifting, I quietly told my boss at work and she was thrilled for me and put me on sitting down jobs until I was ready to tell everyone (telling everyone in the meantime that I had back problems).
28th April 2016 was the happiest day of my life (so far back then), I was 7 weeks pregnant and saw the heartbeat for the first time. I kept saying ‘it’s the heartbeat’ and crying. I knew I’d be happy but I was overcome with joy. I turned to see that my husband was also overcome (yes, my ‘laid back never gets excited about anything’ husband I could see was close to tears), I’d seen pregnancy scans before now but this was the first one with a heartbeat.
Over the next few weeks it was like treading on egg shells, not knowing how much I could do. Trying to remember I was actually pregnant because I would sometimes forget (yes I know how could I forget right?) There was a moment when I stretched up in the cupboard to get something down in the kitchen and before I realised what I was doing I cursed myself and sat down on the kitchen chair, breathing gently trying to calm myself down and telling myself that everything would be ok. I sat there thinking the worst, wondering when another miscarriage would happen, tears springing to my ears. I wiped my tears away telling myself not to worry because the stress wasn’t good for the baby, I left the kitchen and sat in the lounge and put the telly on to distract me from worrying.
I woke the next morning feeling sick, so that reassured me that things were still ok. I had remembered with a previous pregnancy that the sickness had suddenly stopped, and that’s when I discovered that I had miscarried, so feeling sick was good. But I still worried, I would worry all the time with everything I did I would put my hand on my tummy like it was helping to protect the baby and sometimes just to reassure myself but everything was fine.
It was starting to sink in, and after having a 12 week scan it was all confirmed that we were having a baby! We were going to have the family I had dreamed of for a very long time! By 12 weeks most people knew, I had shared our news and everyone was thrilled for us, more thrilled than usual because they knew how much we had wanted this.
We went to Jersey for holiday when I was 15 weeks and it was a lovely break. We had lots of exploring and relaxing to do while we were out there, as we suspected this would be the last holiday for a long time. Half way through the holiday I was laying on the bed one afternoon after being for swim and I felt the baby kick, I was so sure it was a kick but when we looked on the internet we thought that maybe it was a bit too early for kicking.
Five weeks later we had our first scan at the Hospital, by now the clinic had done their bit and wished us all the best! This particular scan was hard because the baby wouldn’t face the right way, he (yes we also discovered we were having a boy) had decided to face away from the camera so the sonographer couldn’t measure his size but at the time she said he looked long. I wasn’t surprised at all by that, I maybe a short arse at 5ft 3 but Mike is a foot taller than me and I had suspected that the baby would be tall like his dad. The nurse had me walking around and trying to get him to move but he wasn’t moving, he was comfortable and wasn’t giving up his place! At one point I ran up and down the stairs in the hospital, I had laughed at myself at the time and it still didn’t work!
We started to discuss names for the baby, at the time we loved the name Oliver so nick-named the bump OB (Oliver Beales). I remember my husband joking and saying obekanobe (at least I HOPE he was joking). We also thought of other names; Joseph, James, Oscar, Edward, Thomas, Connor, Jacob and William. That was the order I had them on my phone, every time we thought of a new one or decided we didn’t like one we would adjust the list and they were in order of preference to start with but Mike hadn’t agreed completely.
The August bank holiday we went to visit friends in the Lake District, she was also pregnant. She was already a mum so she spent the week sharing tips and passing on equipment and books that she found useful. We went shopping and I bought the first lot of ‘blue’ baby clothes, we looked at prams, pushchairs and car seats and got incredibly confused! There was so much to consider!
Needless to say I started a To-Do list…..